scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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