No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
