just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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