What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
