i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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