Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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