did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
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