she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
