Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
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