My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
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she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
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In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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