I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
