You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize