Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
