She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
