if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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