Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
