is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
