it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I understand Curling. That high.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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