Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
