normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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