Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
