last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
