Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
