everyone is single if you try hard enough
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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