dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
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