Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
