He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
he thought i was a dude.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Randomize
