No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize
