You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
