i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
