I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Randomize
