I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
