6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Randomize
