There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
