is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
