Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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