rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
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