Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I feel great
I just peed on a car
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
