weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
