I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
