I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
I love you.
Bad choice
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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