it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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