Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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