I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
