...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
