i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
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