Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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