she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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