Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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