Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
